Rewrite and edit the first 25 pages of the thesis (at least) using my professor’s anotations. Check out the sources, revise them, organise them. Make sure that they are correct and make sense. Here is the list of corrections my professor gave me:
I think you have made a lot of great observations in this draft, and it does read better. I am attaching a version of your thesis with the first 25 pages reorganized through three major sections. I understand how you put this together, from your table of contents, but I just cannot see the thesis passing without a major re-organization. The following seems like the best way.
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Introduction
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Identifying Photography in “Part Two: Hema and Kaushik”
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Photography in the Covert Narrative Plot: Hema’s Loss of Her Father
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Ethical Dimensions of Photography: Sontag’s Perspectives in Lahiri’s Narratives
I am very puzzled about Hema’s loss of her father, but you do quote people who mention this aspect too, so I think deserves its own section (section III) as a “covert narrative.” Are you quoting Lahiri from a separate essay that you found that is not in the bibliography? Your page numbers do not correspond– the page numbers for these stories in the book are p. 223-333, so please make sure your page numbers for these quotations from the story correspond with them. I feel like you’re quoting from a separate essay about this that Lahiri wrote? if so, please add that entry to the bibliography.
I stopped at p 25 to give you a sense of how long the thesis needs to be. It can be longer, but I’ve started to notice that there are repetitions, so I would like you to go through the rest and be very discerning about the points you want to include. Try to see if these points you really want to include can fit in the four major sections I’ve suggested. If they don’t, you can create a fifth section called “Conclusion.”
There are many missing references from the bibliography, and you need to fix this. Please look at the way I reformatted them, and reformat the entries. Do not use bullet points.