Need revisions on professors feedback and complete remainder of paper.
Impressive engagement with your chosen course material! Kudos on that! Revise this portion and include it in the final paper to earn a higher score here. I will add points for this assignment if you earn a higher score there. Please see my in-text edits, comments, and rubric markings.
Suggestions for revision in addition to in-text comments:
– Mia Fischer would make sense here, and you do not have a second material from the class, only Collins.
– You need an artifact and RQs, and the thesis needs to be more specific –
– Consider watching my video about the final paper. It is for grad students, but the requirements for the RQs, artifacts, and arguments are the same; the only difference is that they have a higher word count. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QmKSKpTGUJY
– Try to come up with a more nuanced argument, and research question(s) will help with that;
– try to incorporate COMM sources not just medical sources – such a Johnson, A. L., & LeMaster, L. (Eds.). (2020). Gender futurity, intersectional autoethnography. Routledge. It is available online as a PDF.
-Throughout the theoretical framework section, make nuanced connections to your artifact. The formula for this paper: theoretical framework – 70% or more academic materials and 30% or less artifact materials; analysis section – 70% or more artifact materials and 30% or less academic materials;
Please let me know if you have any questions via email or Canvas message, but not via comment here. We can meet during office hours to discuss the revision plan or message me for an appointment if that doesn’t work.
Kind wishes.