revise of rough draft you did for me, including professors notes on edits needed

Need a better title

please do not use 1st person, “I”

please do not refer to “This essay” either

not sure what “rationality explains his procrastination in claiming the moral high ground” means

can you list the 3 reasons you will argue in support of Hamlet’s behavior

in other words, why does Hamlet behave in the way he does

before answering the question, which behavior and\or actions do you want to justify or defend

his committing murder, his understandable psychotic break with reality or his false insanity or temporary insanity – consider which behavior first and then determine how to justify it

you can begin your essay with a brief overview of the play

but follow it with your thesis and 3 reasons

which actions?  and why are his actions reasonable?

With this in mind, the mental turmoil within Hamlet is in accord with the conceptual leaning characteristic of the Renaissance humanist culture of non-impulsive action.  Where is the documentation for the above sentence?  What exactly does this mean in your argument?  There are sections in this essay that are missing documentation.  Who is Kliman, and why are you bringing up Oedipus?  Oedipus is a completely different play – happens to be a Greek tragedy.  Oedipal Hamlet?  Poison Claudius in Act III?  Tram?

content is confusing – paragraphs need to be revised for clearer structure

Lisa, before plugging in research, you needed to write the draft yourself – research should be used to support your ideas.  Your use of research is confusing and off-topic.  Critics and scholars are not relevant.

Do you think Hamlet is temporarily insane?  Is he faking his unstable behavior?  If so, wny”

Or do you think Hamlet has every right to seek revenge on Claudius for the murder of his father?  If so, why?

Or do you think Hamlet has multiple causes for his psychotic break with reality?  If so, why?

These are 3 examples of possible ideas to pursue for the essay.  And there are several more.  My point is that you must write a draft completely on your own with your ideas and discussion.  Then go to the research and see what you can find to support  your ideas.  Using the research should be the last step in your drafting.

What the critics say or claim is not relevant here.  The essay is not supposed to be a discussion of what critics wrote.  While there are individual ideas and statements in the draft that can be used, the essay needs to be revised with a judgement from you – what do you think of Hamlet’s behavior and\or actions and why can they be justified?

have some serious reservations about the content in this draft – much of it is not properly documented